~distorting my realities~28th dec.'o6~

~christmas eve~ *tolly ,Calcutta.~

when you think things can't get any worse..they actually do..get better i.e.
when i felt cold n' dejected...i realised there was more in store...
i don't wanna trivialise the person,therefore not naming names
...but..anyway..seeing him across the street...i din't feel ecstacy..just plain simple relief.
relief ..coz i din't feel alone anymore.....
relief ..coz i knew i had'nt lost my friend...
i crossd the walkway of solid tar..n' hugged him ..n' i knew everythnig would be fine
....he said he dint like my shoes n' the skirt din't suit me one bit...
n' nothing had changed!
the tide was well past n' had recceded n' we'd stood the test of time
....n' iam proud..
i owe you a lot....you've made me a stronger individual...n' the break* helped too!!..(jus don't go on another one though...life's too short
we might think differently on a zillion issues in life....n' there are things i did i shld.nt have...i lost the thing that was most important to me..your trust...n' i no you still hvn' t forgivven me 1oo% for it..
but when it's you Vs the world..iiam on your side!..i' hope you know iam always going to be just one phone call ..or one flight away.
i don't know abt the better person.(you'l nvr agree that i so am)...but you'v e been the bestest friend...n' you know i'v tried my best too ...
i can go on writting as long as its about you..n' me..n' us*...we've had our share of fuck up's...n' wish whole heartedly that we're done screwing up.
*nothing has changed*...we've both said it n' felt it at one time or another...it better stay the same....n' i know forever's too long...but wtf!!!
as of tday i don't even have to call you ..i can jus stand in front of the mirror n' converse with myself...coz i so know what you'll say next...n' how you'd react...n' even though i know wht'd piss you off i insist on doin so every God damn day!!;)
you've been so many thngs to me..from our initial days..when i used to chuk attitude...to tday....when i take all of your's...we've come a looong way fo sho...i don't want nothing to change..coz the love we have...is more important than a lot of other superficial relationships around.
(a tiny space in cyber world wld never be enough...but iam writing coz its one of thngs i do better than the others..)

*n' this is a thank you..
for the most painful bruises n' bites to the warmest hugs n' the best kisses..
for the wildest trips n' the longest drives..
for locking yourself out of the car at the airport.. the frst time i came..
n' the most fun i'v ever had...
to leaving me alone at the terminal at 4 in the morning...
for making me cry the whole night to then wiping my tears off...
for almost hating me n' then loving me like not many others....
for wacking my beads off...n' lending me your t-shirt...
for being my strictest critique to my staunchest supporter...
for caring for me n' my self respect..even when i din't do so myself...
for driving around town in the rain looking for a place for me to stay....n' understanding why i couldn't stay in that creaky old place..or that all girls* weird ass hotel!!
all the movies that we saw..n' then dint...to the scandalised old men...
n' fulfiling my ice cream cravings...
for all the fights.....verbal..n' also our pre planned physical..(you're not using your legs..or for that matter..your hands!!:0
for restoring my faith in you...me... n' friendship!
the shit we'v done..
the memories we've made...
for stranding me on the highway at 3 a.m.....
n' going in search of the howrah bridge later that night....
n' then getting lost...
the night's we'v e spent...doing so much n' then doing nothing at all
for making every trip the best...till my next!
for not being your polietest best n' then covering up in the most awesome way..(mazaak kar raha hoon yaar!!)
the long conversations.....(whch you are forced into)...n' me walkin bare foot on parkstreet(5 a.m,25th dec.'o6)
fr all the sunrises n' the dairymilks...
n' for always making sure i was allright...
for all the midnight snack sessions....
the wake up calls...
for not always understanding....but letting me just be...
...the azaan*
for pulling my jeans up n' then pulling them down...
for making your* school special ....
for makin prep leave fun...
n' hols memorable...
for the expression at the airport aftr my surprise ....
for the fight's we've faught..almost every single day..
for living and learning and being by my side...
for always being there....even when you necessarily weren't around.
you'r in my prayers always...(slimily 2 ttears hv come!)

forever is too short..coz i'l be there longer than that....